Politics

House Democrats new anti-hate speech resolution

Ilhan Omar to be featured on new Ramadan postage stamps

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Everyone knows that the non stop bullying of freshman Congressperson Ilhan Omar has to stop. A handful of Democrats have been trying to pass an Anti-Hate Speech Resolution meant to marginalize Omar’s world viewpoint. Socialist congresspersons know better, and the hateful resolution is at a standstill as “legacy (old white)” Congress men mansplain and brave socialists resist.

“So, like, I’m not signing that bill. I literally don’t even understand it. I will replace everyone who votes for it,” explained superhero Socialist Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the world leader of socialism. “I’m appearing on CNN very day until this hatred ends. It is morally right. You think Steny Whatever can get on CNN with one text message? Hah!”

The Speaker of the House (for now) Nancy Pelosi, walked back her prior statement that anti-semitism is bad for Ilhan Omar to promote. “We have reached a compromise,” slurred the outgoing former leader of all Democrats. “We won’t pass the resolution. That doesn’t mean we hate anyone openly, but our individual members can if they want to,” continued the embattled former power broker. “The compromise shows our strength, which is diversity. We have ordered the US Postal Service to issue postage stamps with Representative Omar in time for Ramadan this May.”

READ: “I’m quite literally shaking at the thought of that bigotry” NPC Daily exclusive interview with Ilhan Omar

READ: Mount Rushmore “Facelift” part of Green New Deal – faces to be replaced with Obama and persons of color

“It’s a start,” Omar read from a prepared statement, “but my people still suffer. We require immediate citizenship without these hateful screening process. A person without any ID is still a person.”

AOC applauded Omar’s resolve. “The anti-hate bill is a dog whistle for Trump supporters. They have many dog whistles; you can hear them if you listen closely and turn down the volume on CNN. When we hear these dog whistles we must fight our war, if you will.” explained America’s real leader.

Advance orders of these stamps can be obtained through AOCs Justice Democrats PAC (cash only). Order these today as they are sure to sell out as socialists of the world unite.

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Pepe Johnson

Robert ("Pepe") Johnson is a Gen YZ freelance social justice facilitator. A graduate of Palo Alto State with a major in Mime, with a concentration in Walking Against the Wind, with post-graduate online certificates of knowledge in Non-Binary Gender Studies and 21st Century Bathroom Planning, "Pepe" has performed as a nude mime and human statue, as well as a professional protestor. "Pepe" is a nickname, but he has been called that since childhood, not for current political gain or to seem more Mexican. This entire site is satire.

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