10 things you can do as a white person to pay back reparations for slavery and oppression

How many of these are you willing to do to pay reparations?

As we know, African Americans have been oppressed and enslaved for the vast majority of American history. Slavery was just abolished under 200 years ago and Jim Crow ended just a little over 50 years ago. Liberals know in their hearts that blacks in this country are still oppressed just as much as they were centuries ago – as seen by employment numbers, incarcerations and Starbucks arrests.

That’s why NPC Daily has put together a list of 10 things you can do as a white person to pay back reparations for slavery and oppression. After all, modern problems require modern solutions.

1. Start a GoFundMe for Reparations

GoFundMe is a great resource for individuals to raise money for various causes. Whether it be raising money for medical treatments that the government won’t pay for, education that the government won’t pay for or abortions that the government won’t pay for, GoFundMe is the perfect crowd funding tool to get your needs met. Start a GoFundMe and give all the money raised to all of the African Americans you meet in your life.

2. Give your tax refund to an African American

Let’s face it – you lived the entire year without that money. You’re voting for policies that may raise your taxes anyway (for the greater good of course) so why not give your tax refund to an African American? After all, he or she may need it more than you.

3. “Reverse Mugging

Reverse mugging is when you run up to a black person or a person of color and voluntarily give them your wallet and keys to do with what they will. Historically, people of color have always had things taken from them. Now is the time to give back.

4. Spousal Sharing

Liberal men across the nation are letting other men of color sleep with their wives (with the woman’s consent of course). Marriage and monogamy is generally seen as sexist, given the idea that a woman “belongs” to the man through matrimonial oppression. Sharing your wife with a person of color or letting your wife have a boyfriend on the side who is a person of color is a great way to give back.

READ: “My toxic masculinity selfishly prevented me from sharing my wife with other men”

5. Voluntary Slavery

Step into the shoes to of an African American from the early 1800s. What was that like? Find a random African American and vow that you will do his or her bidding for the next month, no questions asked.

6. Only buy from African American dealers

Whether it be potted plants, ingredients, drinks, food or other consumables, shop locally! In this economy, everyone is struggling to make ends meet. Stimulate the African American market by circulating your cash flow with them as opposed to non people of color.

7. Boycott cotton-based clothing

Slaves were often used and abused to pick cotton on plantations. Cotton (being white in and of itself) is a racist material. Don’t buy or wear cotton-based clothing. Read the labels before you buy. Does it say it’s made of cotton? If it does, put it down. If you already own cotton-based clothing, get rid of it. You don’t need that racist material in your house anyway.

8. If you see a black person committing a crime, give them a pass

Don’t call the cops – that will only increase the likelihood that they will wind up in jail. There are enough black people in jail and white people don’t need to contribute to that number by calling the police every time they see a black person committing a crime. Give them a pass. Chances are, they’ve had a hard life.

9. Move back to Europe

Regardless of whether or not you were born in Europe or your parents were born in Europe – move to Europe. African Americans have endured enough “move back to Africa” slurs over the years that they only way to truly repay for unending trauma caused by those words is to move to Europe.

10. Liquefy all of your assets and give it all to a random black person

Everything you have. Your house, your car, your belongings, your savings, your retirement fund and your children’s college funds – everything you have accrued during your entire existence, give it to a black person. They deserve it more than you.

We hope that with this concise list, privileged white Americans will take it upon themselves to go down each measure to play their part in paying reparations to the African American community. It is important to keep in mind, however, that even if all ten of these items were completed by a white American, he or she must understand that they are still racist and privileged and nothing will ever really change that.

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The creator of NPC Daily. The mastermind behind the entire NPC Daily movement. Yes, this entire website is satire and not meant to be taken seriously. It's for fun. Chill. See "about" page for more details. Now that we got that taken care of, repeat after me: "Orange man the absolute worst."
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