Culture

Jussie Smollett and O.J. Simpson to co-star in sci-fi film about white supremacy

The progressive empire strikes back!

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Written by R Personified

You may have heard the name Jussie Smollett in recent news. Some people somewhere somehow believe there was a scandal involved. The persecuted actor has been categorically absolved of any wrongdoing, thanks to valuable connections to the well-beloved Obama family. No other legitimate news source is looking into what exactly happened, so we will not either.

Jussie’s cool sunglasses and piercing jawline have inspired countless diverse and like-minded individuals to join the resistance against Donald Trump. Smollett has truly become the face of social justice, along with congress members Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC), Ilhan Omar, and Rashida Tlaib. Now the progressive face of Jussie is moving on to bigger things, even bigger than the universally celebrated TV drama Empire; he will co-star alongside celebrity O.J. Simpson (released from prison in 2017) in what will surely be the greatest film of the 21st century.

Jussie Smollett revealed some clues to NPC Daily reporters regarding the movie’s premise:

So you know Star Wars? And Star Trek? And Independence Day? Well, this film will like take inspiration from all the best parts of those films, erase all the racist, homophobic, patriotic shit — and then basically O.J. and I will try to blast apart our enemies, which are white people from another world who try to kill all other races. It’s metaphoric, you know, for defeating white supremacy in America and around the world.

  • Jussie Smollett

Wow; words cannot describe the courage of Jussie! So woke! So charming! We were also able to get AOC on the record concerning the new sci-fi film:

When I heard that Jussie would have a role in a major film, I was like, you know, just feeling this passion inside me. A gay, black American hero on the big screen! With O.J. Simpson, no less! Justice is like served, you know? All those conservative haters who oppress minorities and emit greenhouse gases will literally be the ones needing safe spaces when this movie comes out. I can’t wait to see the rightist tears of Donald Trump and Ben Shapiro!

  • Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

NPC Daily will bend over backwards to provide the first and most glowing review of the future blockbuster hit. Stay tuned as more information unfolds.

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R Personified

R Personified is literally the personification of the resistance movement against the unpopular and immoral Donald Trump. R's resisting ability has been greatly amplified over the course of Trump's administration, taking objective journalism to heights the world has never seen in its entire existence. R is a proud vegan and will unabashedly smash any dairy product in sight. He is immensely open and tolerant to anything and anyone, unless you're a homophobic, xenophobic, carnivorous, pouncing, patriarchal, Trump-loving fascist. This entire site is satire.

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