Trump

Trump deploys tanks to the southern border

A new explosive way Trump is targeting undocumented Americans

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Written by Neville Percival Croft

Trump’s devilish tactics are nothing short of barbaric. Each day, thousands of innocent persyns of color are rounded up and locked away, solely for the crime of trying to enter America for a better life. We’ve seen the orange menace deploy all sorts of grueling methods to dispose of the document troubled and legally challenged Americans. Apache attack helicopters, snipers and attack dogs have all claimed their fair share of casualties.

Well now he’s going overboard by sending hundreds of tanks to the southern border. Their purpose: to destroy brown children. Already they’ve been causing chaos by chasing the migrants and rolling over Mexican flags. Explosions now plague the border and the sounds of crying fill the air.

Only a heartless monster could laugh at something so evil.

President Trump has been thoroughly questioned about his use of tanks. After being chanted at repeatedly by NPC Daily journalists, Trump came forth and gave a horrifying statement sure to rock the soul of any sane individual.

Seeing these cnts get the sht blown out of them makes my day. We’re winning bigly right now. Can’t wait to test the missiles ready for 2020!

  • Donald Trump, hater of children.

Fortunately, we’ve seen brave and fierce heroes take the charge against the terrible tanks. AOC, Ilhan Omar, Rashida Tlaib, and the squad member have all began vigorous protests, with AOC herself crying seen in front of a tank.

AOC bravely stands her ground against Trump’s legions of doom.

We urge all able-bodied and non able-bodied persyns to go outside and begin chanting this chant in unison:

Trump no thanks
We don’t want
Your stupid tanks!

Open borders are our strength.

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Neville Croft

Neville Percival Croft is a brave, bold and daring reporter for NPC Daily after being laid off from BuzzFeed because of xirs apparently "overtly communist views". Nonetheless, Neville is a unique, freethinking individual that brings lots of cards to the table such as xirs ability to smash the patriarchy in less than 10 minutes and xirs prestigious Gender Studies degree helps xir to critically analyse and report in a completely unbiased fashion. Also, xe is a proud Greysexual Novigender and has a moderate soy latte addiction. Please never assume xirs gender. This entire site is satire.

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