White progressives form racially-segregated autonomous zone to protect people of color

Black House Autonomous Zone ultimately fails due to scarcity of black people within BLM movement

Peaceful #BlackLivesMatter activists have attempted to establish another CHAZ, this time in the very heart of our nation’s capitol.

On Monday evening protestors were setting fires and hurling racial epithets at black police officers to clear the way for what would become the Black House Autonomous Zone (BHAZ), a fenced-off area in the middle of Lafayette Park within which POCs would be safely isolated from white people.

READ: Bradford University Safe Space — No Whites Allowed

Yet the lack of adequate minority representation within their ranks proved an obstacle to these anti-racist protestors. They briefly considered going into black neighborhoods with their heads and faces covered on (to protect from COVID) and fetching some blacks of their own, an idea that was ultimately discarded by organizers over safety concerns.

“I’m not going into a black neighborhood without an armed police escort, and those bastards are refusing to take me.”

  • Nadia P. Clarke, BLM organizer and activist for hire

After setting a few more fires and assaulting an unapproved journalist, the activists eventually grew bored and decided to protest the results of the 2016 election instead. So they grabbed their wooden shields and headed off to the White House, where they chanted in unison the official anthem of the #Resistance, Trump and Pence, We Say No.

Given Joe Biden’s immense popularity and the blinding rage the average American feels at the very mention of Donald Trump’s name, Trump and Pence are sure to suffer a humiliating 2020 defeat. ✊🏿

Staff Writer

One of our wage slave writers contracted with NPC Daily. Repeat after me - orange man bad. Everything on this site is satire.
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