Biden will replace Ginsburg with woman of color

Cardi B, Stacey Abrams, Liz Warren top of short list

When the going gets tough, Joe Biden gets going. With the passing of Supreme Court Justice Ginsburg, nearly all Americans are hiding in their basements, wearing masks, washing their hands and refreshing their browsers to see what racist choice Trump will make to replace the Wokest Justice.

On the other hand, Joe Biden knows the heartbeat of America. “I’m Joe Biden and I’m a coal miner from Scranton, PA. I live inside my basement with my mask on 24/7 just like you.” Biden continued after turning a page in his notes, “This is upside down lift it up and turn it. There…I’m picking a black judge to replace the one who died. Something, something, … huh? wait … make sure to say y’all and ain’t. Y’all! Ain’t! There I did it. Anyway I shouldn’t say anything else I’ll get in trouble.”

Vice President Biden‘s speechmaking prowess is often compared to the great British Labour Party Leader Neil Kinnoch, and it’s hard not to see the similarities sometimes. But Mr. Biden has his own flair for well reasoned arguments, especially when combatting the evils of Trump. “He needs to act like a President, listen to the science, Trump bad.”

“On the first day in office I’ll appoint a woman of color to replace the one who left. Black women should get every job.” Sources inside Biden’s earpiece say that front runners are Elizabeth Warren, Stacey Abrams and Cardi B (said to be Biden’s favorite). Warren has reportedly mailed out a 23 and me DNA sample to confirm she is black to avoid heckling from Trump. Biden made Abrams a candidate “so that she would have some sort of job.” A bobo of Cardi B, speaking on condition of anonymity, explained “Dang yo Biden’s the shit. We also appreciate that he only says “y’all” ” and “ain’t” when speaking to black people.”

Meanwhile, in the Oval Grinch Cave Trump ignored Biden’s choices, instead bragging about himself for something about peace in the Middle East and the development of a vaccine for COVID-19.

It’s time to settle for Joe. Vote Blue no matter who. And tell us with a straight face you don’t want Cardi B on the Supreme Court!

Diversity is our strength.

Pepe Johnson

Robert ("Pepe") Johnson is a Gen YZ freelance social justice facilitator. A graduate of Palo Alto State with a major in Mime, with a concentration in Walking Against the Wind, with post-graduate online certificates of knowledge in Non-Binary Gender Studies and 21st Century Bathroom Planning, "Pepe" has performed as a nude mime and human statue, as well as a professional protestor. "Pepe" is a nickname, but he has been called that since childhood, not for current political gain or to seem more Mexican. This entire site is satire.
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