Joe Biden hints at nominating Corn Pop for US Secretary of Defense

Corn Pop's history of geopolitical strength could prove essential in America's safety

If there’s one thing our country needs, it’s a strong military with a strong Secretary of Defense. That’s probably why Joe Biden has hinted at naming his former childhood nemesis, Corn Pop, to one of the highest military positions available.

Corn Pop is a fearless, ruthless, damn near heartless bad dude who ran a bunch of bad boys – but there’s one person from whom Corn Pop backed down, and that’s Joe Biden himself. Corn Pop will make sure the United States is doesn’t get caught rubbing the hairy legs of our adversaries. Corn Pop will be the one wrapping the chains around the heads of our geopolitical rivals.

Joe Biden’s pick of Corn Pop will be a step up from anything Trump has done in his feeble attempts to make our country safer. Diversity is our strength. Corn Pop will protect us.

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