The people of California have defeated the far-right’s latest attempt to sabotage Our Democracy! The coup against Gavin Newsom has failed, and Larry Elder has fled into exile — his wife and property seized and burned by the gorilla-masked antifaschistische praetoriae. Should he ever return, his head and hands will likewise be confiscated and placed on display at City Hall.
Yet while Democrat voters across America are rejoicing, Governor Newsom cautions that our work is far from over.
“California clearly wasn’t ready for a Black governor,” Newsom remarked to attendees of his Monday evening rally at the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute in New York City. “We’re just too systemically racist.”
Newsom vows to spend the remainder of his first term spending federal tax money on human infrastructure and researching creative new ways to punish white people for their original sin of racism.